Gadha Haathi ek Samaan, Lekin Mera Amrika Mahaan
Celebrities love my boyfriend. He's the most precious political commodity of all - the independent voter. His phone's been bombarded with recorded messages, mostly from the Obama campaign. If their organization and zeal in LA is anything to go by, Hillary should be very, very afraid.
Speaking of voting, all these inane propositions that they manage to insert into the ballot is such a perversion of democracy. As the boyfriend says, if you want me to make all the public policy decisions, why the hell did I elect you jokers in the first place? We spent all morning poring into the proposition list, trying to make sense of them and decide what he should vote on each.
Apart from the celebrity flavour (which is also bland and generic, Hollywood style), I find American elections rather boring. By the time politicians get churned through the PR and media minder mill, polished, tweaked, hammered into shape, they all start resembling each other, all standardized units of so much blah. The same sound bites, the same careful balancing of issues, the same inoffensive spiel.
And in any case, elections remind me always remind me of this incredible scene from the Pakistani stage play "Bakra Qishton Pay"
Umer Sharif is a professor who's also a politician on the side. He's rehearsing a political speech to be delivered in a gathering with his servant Sharfu.
Umer: "Bhaiyyo main agar jeet gaya to jo sadkein bani hain unko tudwa ke phir se banwa doonga"
(Friends, if I win, I will demolish the existing roads and get them rebuilt)
Sharfu (looking shocked): "Yeh kyon?" (Why?)
Umer: "Bas unke thekedaar ne to kama liya, ab hamara thekedaar kaise kamayega?"
(Well, the previous political party's contractors made money off the road contracts, now our guys have to make some dough too)
So m0ve over Halliburton, there's a new game in town!
The video deserves to be seen in full, so here it is, the political speech section: